NARUTO 609 spoof prediction
Madara takes the offense, having quickly recovered from Gai's attack. "The kid really is something," he states as Susanoo grows around him. Gai rid himself and Bee of the restraints on them and Kakashi demotivates Obito by fighting on par with him.
"I AM UZUMAKI NARUTO!" Naruto yells, throwing another full Kyuubi-mode attack. Madara's Susanoo parries the attack but using an underhanded tail lash, Kyuubi's shroud knocks Susanoo off balance, toppling it and momentarily exposing Madara himself.
"I AM UZUMAKI NARUTO!" Naruto yells again, as he launches a volley of attacks using all of Kyuubi's tails overhead. They pierce into Susanoo's shroud and Madara barely managed to dodge them by using a Mokuton, just the way Danzou used it to deflect Sasuke's arrows.
Kyuubi's chakra fangs dig deep into the Susanoo, pinning it down completely. In the background, a pre-existing Bunshin has already gone into Sage Mode. It disperses, transferring the chakra over to Naruto - he's in a new Kyuubi/Sage-mode.
Madara strikes hard with an array of razor sharp spear-formed Mokuton ninjutsu, trying to avoid Naruto's offense. Naruto inches closer, breaking through Susanoo's shell with his bare hands. "I AM UZUMAKI NARUTO!" He cleverly states, inspiring all around him with his witty remarks, "I AM UZUMAKI NARUTO!" he explains once more, as if we didn't fucking know it yet.
He pounds through the cracks and grabs hold of Susanoo's cracked shroud. "I AM--" he continues, "UZUMAKI--" he splits Susanoo in half by sheer physical strength and immediately pulls himself inside, "NARUTO!"
Uzumaki Naruto flies straight at Madara and slams his right fist through Madara's body, right next to the 1st Hokages exposed face. Naruto glances at this, surprised, remembering the Hokage monument. He seems to think, staring at the emotionless face of the 1st. "I AM UZUMAKI NARUTO!" he yells, seemingly trying to introduce himself to this new potential friend of his.
Not getting a proper introduction from the 1st, Naruto gets increasingly more frustrated. He looks up at Madara with a quizzical look on his face. The latter isn't sure whether Naruto is insane or not and pulls a face of disbelief and horror.
"Is this kid mentally retarded?" He wonders out loud. He feels something is awry. He looks at the other combatants. Gai gives him a "Hey, don't ask me..."-look, Kakashi just sighs in frustration. Obito can't help but snicker briefly, but quickly remembers to go back into character.
"I see," Madara says, "so all of this...?"
Obito lets go of Kakashi and helps him up. "Well..." He looks around and sees Kakashi nod. "Well, yeah. We're just here to humor the kid. Hokage, Kazekage, et cetera. It means nothing anymore. We give that title to old men, women and children now. Even us 'villains' are pretty happy with our place in the world. We use fucking magic for fuck's sake. No need for real war."
Madara ponders this for a moment. "Sooo... the moon's eye plan?" he asks. Obito sits down. "It's off. Unnecessary. We can revive the dead. I've long resurrected Rin some years ago. We divorced."
"All of this is just to keep this retard and other jinchuuriki's emotions in check. Sure, we ditched this pissed-off ancient source of chakra in them, but that's why we humor them. Until they don't. We'll make 'em feel important, make them Kage if they so please and we all live happily ever after."
Kakashi follows up: "Even his team mate Sasuke is in on it. A prodigy and genius, but his clan was killed off. Elaborate plan, that: something to please the village Elders. We sent the kid to Orochimaru to learn the Edo Tensei ninjutsu and help him perfect it."
"Took Jiraiya quite some time to keep Naruto off of Sasuke's back. This kid is kinda stubborn and unexpected. He eventually got himself killed for the sake of getting away from raising this idiot for another few years."
Obito continues. "In fact, sources tell me Sasuke is on his way to rez his parents and get the full story himself. From there on out his father can rez the rest of the clan since he has all their DNA. And if that fails, I have all their eyes, so I can do it as well."
Naruto: "But... I... am..."
Obito pulls off the seemingly scarred skin from his face. It's Iruka after all. "Yeah, fine. You be Hokage. Just don't make a fuss. That Kyuubi thing is still pretty pissed off at mankind for some reason."
Madara ponders all this for a moment. "Well, fuck. If we're all happy anyhow I'll just go build myself a wood logging station in the woods around here, then."
THE END
Madara takes the offense, having quickly recovered from Gai's attack. "The kid really is something," he states as Susanoo grows around him. Gai rid himself and Bee of the restraints on them and Kakashi demotivates Obito by fighting on par with him.
"I AM UZUMAKI NARUTO!" Naruto yells, throwing another full Kyuubi-mode attack. Madara's Susanoo parries the attack but using an underhanded tail lash, Kyuubi's shroud knocks Susanoo off balance, toppling it and momentarily exposing Madara himself.
"I AM UZUMAKI NARUTO!" Naruto yells again, as he launches a volley of attacks using all of Kyuubi's tails overhead. They pierce into Susanoo's shroud and Madara barely managed to dodge them by using a Mokuton, just the way Danzou used it to deflect Sasuke's arrows.
Kyuubi's chakra fangs dig deep into the Susanoo, pinning it down completely. In the background, a pre-existing Bunshin has already gone into Sage Mode. It disperses, transferring the chakra over to Naruto - he's in a new Kyuubi/Sage-mode.
Madara strikes hard with an array of razor sharp spear-formed Mokuton ninjutsu, trying to avoid Naruto's offense. Naruto inches closer, breaking through Susanoo's shell with his bare hands. "I AM UZUMAKI NARUTO!" He cleverly states, inspiring all around him with his witty remarks, "I AM UZUMAKI NARUTO!" he explains once more, as if we didn't fucking know it yet.
He pounds through the cracks and grabs hold of Susanoo's cracked shroud. "I AM--" he continues, "UZUMAKI--" he splits Susanoo in half by sheer physical strength and immediately pulls himself inside, "NARUTO!"
Uzumaki Naruto flies straight at Madara and slams his right fist through Madara's body, right next to the 1st Hokages exposed face. Naruto glances at this, surprised, remembering the Hokage monument. He seems to think, staring at the emotionless face of the 1st. "I AM UZUMAKI NARUTO!" he yells, seemingly trying to introduce himself to this new potential friend of his.
Not getting a proper introduction from the 1st, Naruto gets increasingly more frustrated. He looks up at Madara with a quizzical look on his face. The latter isn't sure whether Naruto is insane or not and pulls a face of disbelief and horror.
"Is this kid mentally retarded?" He wonders out loud. He feels something is awry. He looks at the other combatants. Gai gives him a "Hey, don't ask me..."-look, Kakashi just sighs in frustration. Obito can't help but snicker briefly, but quickly remembers to go back into character.
"I see," Madara says, "so all of this...?"
Obito lets go of Kakashi and helps him up. "Well..." He looks around and sees Kakashi nod. "Well, yeah. We're just here to humor the kid. Hokage, Kazekage, et cetera. It means nothing anymore. We give that title to old men, women and children now. Even us 'villains' are pretty happy with our place in the world. We use fucking magic for fuck's sake. No need for real war."
Madara ponders this for a moment. "Sooo... the moon's eye plan?" he asks. Obito sits down. "It's off. Unnecessary. We can revive the dead. I've long resurrected Rin some years ago. We divorced."
"All of this is just to keep this retard and other jinchuuriki's emotions in check. Sure, we ditched this pissed-off ancient source of chakra in them, but that's why we humor them. Until they don't. We'll make 'em feel important, make them Kage if they so please and we all live happily ever after."
Kakashi follows up: "Even his team mate Sasuke is in on it. A prodigy and genius, but his clan was killed off. Elaborate plan, that: something to please the village Elders. We sent the kid to Orochimaru to learn the Edo Tensei ninjutsu and help him perfect it."
"Took Jiraiya quite some time to keep Naruto off of Sasuke's back. This kid is kinda stubborn and unexpected. He eventually got himself killed for the sake of getting away from raising this idiot for another few years."
Obito continues. "In fact, sources tell me Sasuke is on his way to rez his parents and get the full story himself. From there on out his father can rez the rest of the clan since he has all their DNA. And if that fails, I have all their eyes, so I can do it as well."
Naruto: "But... I... am..."
Obito pulls off the seemingly scarred skin from his face. It's Iruka after all. "Yeah, fine. You be Hokage. Just don't make a fuss. That Kyuubi thing is still pretty pissed off at mankind for some reason."
Madara ponders all this for a moment. "Well, fuck. If we're all happy anyhow I'll just go build myself a wood logging station in the woods around here, then."
THE END
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